Sunday, August 28, 2011

Living Life

So, as most of you know by now I’ve put theatre on the back-burner for awhile to ease my burn-out.  I’m also making the effort to spend far less time online (I type onto my blog, heh) and live life outside of my head for a bit.  I’ve been focusing more on my heath, mental and physical, as well which is quite amazing. 

It’s all been very eye-opening.  Physically I am amazed at the things my body can do that I never thought it could.  Mentally I’m finding all kinds of new things to work my brain.  (I don’t watch much TV and now spend very little time online)

Emotionally thought, it’s been….awkward.  I’m realizing I really don’t have a lot of friends.  Close friends.  Well, let me elaborate on this, lest you think I’m throwing myself a pity party or something.  I don’t socialize well.  I’ve known this, but it’s sinking in now.  Really sinking in.  It’s not that I don’t have a lot of friends, I just don’t know how to BE a friend.  And I don’t know how to talk to people.  Brendan’s been super busy with theatre stuff and I am left to my own devices a lot, which I am totally fine with.  I get to go to some stitch groups and spend time keeping up the house, and exercising.  Days go by and I start to realize how lonely I get.  The really sad part: I don’t do anything about it.  I sulk for an evening and then go on with my life and then I'm fine again.

I’m not entirely sure where I am going with this post.  But spending all this time improving myself and living life in the world around me I’m just making all sorts of observations.  About the world and myself.  Why I feel the need to share them I’m not entirely sure. 

I think I’ve been on my laptop enough, I should enjoy the amazing day that today is and crochet on the front porch for a bit. 

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